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My Sister-in-Law Is Ruining the U.S. Economy
Using Technology To Avoid Commitment (The Padded Room Variety)
My Dad Has No Rhythm, Yet Is Master Of The Dance
Last Minute Gift Ideas To Keep You From Becoming Ebenezer Screwed
Homo Sapiens Vacationus At The Watering Hole
Mortal Kombat: Battle For The Monkey Bars!
Facebook Ruined My Life. Now They Must Pay
Why I Would Rather Try To Find The Funny Than The Meaning Of Life
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Category Archives: Euphemish
The 3 Most Powerful Letters In The English Language
Words can be powerful weapons, but one little suffix can beat them all. Three letters provide a mighty shield for the user to hide behind. I’m talking about “ish.” “ish” means neither yes nor no. It admits while admitting nothing. … Continue reading
Your Customer Advocate Will Now Give You A Blindfold And A Cigarette
Here’s a little pop quiz, kids. If I am on the phone waiting to speak with a “customer advocate,” I am trying to reach which of the following parties: Better Business Bureau Small Claims Court Health insurance company claims adjuster … Continue reading
Posted in Euphemish Tagged business, filing a claim, health, health insurance, humor, insurance, musings 78 Comments
Stuff That Can Rub (A-Dub, Dub) You Out
There have been disturbing accounts in the news recently of people flipping out on a potent street drug. The most horrific of these stories was about a man who tried to eat another person while high. The drug of choice for these discriminating users? Bath … Continue reading
Posted in Euphemish, General Ramblings Tagged bath salts, drugs, Euphemish, Fatal Attraction, health, humor, musings, news 57 Comments
I’ve often heard women lament, “There just aren’t any gentlemen around anymore!” Au contraire! They’re still out there; you just have to look in the right place. Might I suggest a strip joint? Merriam-Webster Dictionary, my online, go-to source at … Continue reading
Posted in Euphemish Tagged advertising, gentlemen's clubs, humor, life, men and women, musings, postaweek2011, strip clubs 40 Comments
Change Would Do You Good
Last week I posted a beginners guide to the new language, Euphemish. (check out my post “New Language Discovered” to get up-to-speed). From time to time I’ll present more advanced concepts for the inquiring student. Today, we’ll explore the Euphemish term, Rate Change … Continue reading
Posted in Euphemish, General Ramblings Tagged con artists, humor, insurance, life, postaweek2011, writing 9 Comments
New Language Discovered!
Quickly adopted by politicians and advertisers. A little old lady was holding up my line at the grocery store. She was trying to return a carton of ice cream. “It says New & Improved but it tastes the same.” She said, … Continue reading
Posted in Euphemish, General Ramblings, Peg-Co Catalog Tagged advertising, business, con artists, humor, language, marketing, musings, politics, postaweek2011, writing 33 Comments