My Mother’s Hands

Isn’t my mom a babe?

I have my mother’s hands.   That’s not something I’ve ever taken as a compliment – no offense, Mom.

Read more about my great Mom.

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Ain’t Technology Great?

Photo source: Shopped or not

 A MODERN BUSINESS PLAY

The setting: A typical office email exchange…

The players:

Peg” a dedicated (albeit technologically challenged) insurance agent
Fred” a dedicated attorney who represents Peg’s client
Missy” Peg’s tech-savvy assistant

Wow – a play about business? Tell me more!

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Government Agencies Land In The Alphabet Soup

The recent rash of bad behavior by certain United States federal agencies has left a bad taste in our collective mouths, but there is a bright side.  These stains on the national honor have given rise to several new buzzwords that are quickly making their way into everyday usage.

For those who like to be on the cutting edge of language evolution, I got your definitions right here, along with an example of how each term is used.

Lay it on me..I like learnin’

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Let’s Go For A Visit!

Hi de ho, Guys and Gals –

Today I’m going for a little visit to The Byronic Man‘s blog.  Won’t you join me?

Our genial host, Joel, is a bon vivant, a raconteur; in short, just the sort of Renaissance man-about-town that you should get to know.

Yours Truly, Peg-o-Leg, is the blogger in the spotlight (why does that make me think of “deer in the headlights”?) today in his ongoing series, “20 Questions”.  This catchy title is shorthand for “getting some other idiot to write my post for me so I can put new material up on this-here blog while doing diddly-squat myself.” 

When he asked me to play, I thought “Hmmm.  Sweating blood over a really, really tough list of essay questions designed to bare my very soul to public ridicule.   Count me in!”

Come on along and join all the other Byromaniacs in one of my favorite pastimes – learning all about me.   I’m sure Joel will have a huge supply of beer, wine and cookies on hand so it will be a rollicking good time!

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I Am The Line Slayer

Continue reading

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Friday Folderol

Howdy folks!

Just a few little items before we break for the weekend. 

1) WordPress has something messed up with their Reader function which lists new posts for subscribed blogs.   Some blogs have totally dropped of my list in the last month, some blogs show up intermittently, and a couple of days ago the function stopped working entirely.  I’ve checked on the Support forums and this is a problem that lots of bloggers are having.  It might be a problem with Explorer because it seems those who use Firefox are not affected.  I assume that the Knights of the WordPress Roundtable are hard at work on this, and it will be fixed soon.

In the meantime, I don’t have any notice of who is posting what.  If I haven’t stopped by to say hi, don’t worry – it’s not me, it’s them.

2) My friend Jules over at Go Guilty Pleasures will be 30 on Monday.  What a baby – I’ve got shoes older than that!  As part of the birthday celebration she is having a competition: describe your guilty pleasure and win a fabulous prize basket.  You can trot on over and enter if you like, but I wouldn’t waste your time.  I aim to get me that basket – Chocolate Covered Bacon is my middle name!  No, really.  I had it legally changed.  It was kind of hard to fit the new monogram on my towels, but it was worth it.

3) My friend Katy over at k8edid is also having a competition – this one is a writing competition.  A writing competition – what a great idea!  Hmmm…where have I heard of that before? (hint, hint, right hand column, hint, hint)

Katy has a really great idea – a series of posts on each of the deadly sins.  The first theme is Gluttony and the first batch of entrants was posted the other day, including the modest offering of your humble correspondent.  (That’s me, by the way, in case the “humble” adjective confused you.)  Go check out all the great entrants!

4) Caption contest fame and glory over at the Good Greatsby’s blog continues to elude me, so you don’t need to go over there for anything.

If you want to know which blogs are the bestest, just follow me around the blogosphere like a mad stalker and read what I read.  Just be sure to return to my blog constantly (almost to the level of obsessively, but just short of me having to call the authorities) and love my stuff a lot.

Have a great weekend y’all – have fun and be safe!

 

HEY- late breaking complaining to go with #1 above.  Where did “Comments I’ve Made” go as a choice in the header?  Now I’m TOTALLY separated from all y’all with no way to find my way back.  WordPress is cutting me off from the herd – I’m probably headed for the bloggy slaughter house!!!

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I’m The Crypt Keeper…No, Really!

Just a sec, Indy, I can’t get this Social Security entry to balance.

I’m never going to move to Paris. 

It just hit me that I’ll never live in a garret in Montmartre, spending my days painting and my nights discussing Existentialism over wine and croissant.   The chances were always slim.  If you haven’t run away from home by age 52, it probably isn’t going to happen.  But at least there was a possibility.  No more. 

I’m going to be stuck in this small, midwestern town until I shrivel up and die.

Why, Peg…tell me why???

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Embracing the Whack-A-Mole Philosophy of Life

Sorry – I forgot to shave today.

 

Cross that bridge when you come to it.
Let tomorrow take care of itself.
Que sera, sera.
Don’t borrow trouble.

These are all good mottos, but not for me.

I’ve always been a worrywart.  I’ll get a troublesome “what-if” between my teeth and chew on it like a dog with a bone.  

This approach isn’t working for me, though.   I’m not very good at it.  After investing countless hours worrying about something, downing bottles of Tums along the way, that particular problem rarely materializes.

Does Whack-A-Mole really mean something dirty?

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Dear Political Opponent

Medic. MEDIC!

Dear Political Opponent,

Our parties are at war.  It’s undeclared, of course; more of a military action, but no less real for that.

The distance between us stretches as a vast, barren wasteland which few dare to cross.

Yours is a gentle voice of reason in a world gone mad. Tell me more!

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Step Away From the 1040 And Nobody Gets Hurt

 

Back away.  Back.  Away.  Now.

I’ve got a sharpened #2 Ticonderoga pointed at my jugular, and I’m not afraid to use it.

The floor is littered with broken pencils, crumpled 8863s and great tufts of naturally blond hair, pulled out by the roots.  The air reeks of stale coffee and desperation.

I’ll never get my taxes done.

You probably don’t want to read any more about this depressing topic…

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