Actually, I don’t know why the caged chicken clucks. But Brad Pitt does.
Pitt lashed out at retail giant Costco last week, saying they are laying an egg with their treatment of the chickens that supply their stores with our favorite breakfast food. He alleges that Costco buys eggs laid by chickens who spend all of their short lives crammed into little cages.
The Hunky McHunkster threatened to stop shopping at Costco if they don’t take immediate steps to address this issue. When reminded by a flunky that their household doesn’t actually shop at Costco, as each of his 23 mansions is stocked via goodie baskets home delivered by Dean & DeLuca, Brad responded, “that’s not the point.”
Pitt joined fellow humanitarians – oops, no, I meant poultritarians – Ryan Gosling and Bill Maher in calling for action now. Fans weren’t surprised to hear that Gosling is concerned about this issue since geese and chickens are so near one another on the food chain.
Industry insiders say this may be just the tip of the Chicken-gate iceberg. A Costco boycott may be next. As animal rights activists rightly point out, even those of us who are meat-eaters have a moral obligation to ensure animals are not tortured.
In other news this week, a film surfaced which shows a Planned Parenthood director discussing the aftermarket parts side of the abortion industry while enjoying a large Caesar salad and a glass of Pinot Noir. She explained that docs must be very careful when performing the procedure. It’s OK to crush the rest of the merchandise, but in the competitive business of unborn baby parts, end users want the choice bits kept intact.
Some critics have said that, regardless of where you stand on the abortion issue, such a callous, matter-of-fact commentary ought to be disturbing to any person possessing even the merest shred of feeling. Other critics have remarked that a chilled Chardonnay or a nice Sauvignon Blanc would have been a better choice with that salad.
In a you-tell-me-if-it’s-related story, parents shared an ultrasound video showing their unborn baby clapping. They freely admit the video was edited because they thought it would be cute to make it look like the baby was clapping along to their singing. The fact remains that the blob of fetal tissue that they refer to as “their baby” was clapping. In utero. At only 14 weeks gestation.
While interest in Chicken-gate is high and is almost certain to escalate among elites in Hollywood and the media, their response to these non-poultry-related news items was a collective shoulder-shrug accompanied by a bored, “meh.”