
Picture courtesy Picture Day, http://picproj2722.wordpress.com/
“Obama is a communist.”
“Republicans hate women.”
“Your brother got cancer from drinking Coke.”
These are actual things that real people said to me during the past week. Each statement was delivered as fact. With firm, fist-pounding-on-table certainty. With an absolute conviction which entertained no room for doubt or argument against the shining purity of its certaineous certaintude.
Me? I envy that assurance. When I was younger I was sure of all sorts of things. As I’ve gotten older, however, I’ve come to know just how little I know.
For example, I don’t believe the President is a communist just because he wants the poorest in our country to share in its riches. I don’t believe Republicans hate women because they think we should protect unborn babies. And I don’t believe my brother, Bill, gave himself cancer of the tongue because he drank too many carbonated beverages.
Here’s what I’m left with at this stage of life:
– A few (very few) “knows”
– A smorgasbord of “believes”
– A bottomless supply of “hopes”
I know that there is a God. I believe that He cares for us. I hope that someday His plan for all of this will be made clear. In the meantime, maybe I…maybe all of us…should try to keep an open mind and an open heart. Just a little open.
But what do I know.
Karl Popper said that all knowledge is provisional, I like to remember that. Not sure what he said about Coke or Republicans though.
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He didn’t say that he likes to remember that; that was me saying that (just to clarify!).
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“all knowledge is provisional” – I like that! Whether Karl Popper said it or Vanessa-Jane.
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I have come to the same conclusions as you over time–funny how much we used to think we knew and now how much we know we don’t know
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Maybe that’s the definition of wisdom – knowing how much we don’t?
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Whoever said your brother got cancer from drinking Coke is a jerk face. I have no idea if Coke causes cancer, but that is just mean and insensitive. Also, I totally agree with this post. I know some things to be true, but there is so much I’m not sure about that I’m willing to be proved wrong.
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We just have to keep an open mind, right?
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…and EVERYONE, except the medical community, has a cure for that nasty cold…..and hiccups!
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…and can tell if you’re pregnant with a boy or a girl by which way the bump sticks out.
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Loved this post, and I loved your breakdown of knows, believes, and hopes. In the same vein as this, many people take what they read (or hear) at face value, never taking the time to do a little extra investigation to see whether what they’ve just learned is indeed fact. Usually it isn’t.
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Ain’t THAT the truth, Carrie! “but I read it on the internet!” is their battle cry.
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Mr./Ms. Absolute: “Reindeer are descended from six-legged unicorns.”
Handy reply, to be used if, and only if, pressed to respond: “I’m sure you must be right.”
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That IS a handy reply that I’m going to use. No use argufying with the clueless.
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I love this. I love ya. What a marvelous post. Sweet, sensible, so very profound.
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Ditto.
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What she said.
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Aw, thanks youse guys. You’re such sweet friends. (Does “youse” have an “e” on the end? I always get that confused.)
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I guess I’m supposed to take your post with a grain of salt, too. 🙂
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No, whatever I say is the only absolutely certainly for sure thing in the entire universe of recorded thought! Or so I believe.
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I used to think I was in control. That went out in my 40’s. Now I know He is.
Amazing how folks can pronounce wrong info with more self assurance than I do just teaching grammar which for the most part is either right or wrong. It’s not that I don’t know. I just know folks don’t like a “know it all” and certain folks really don’t like the voice of authority. I know the grammar is correct. I know what rules to follow and which ones should not be broken. BUT, I want to be open to a new spin on things and welcome another point of view. Now if there are any grammatical rules broken in this comment…I beg forgiveness and understanding. 🙂
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I never thought of grammar being open to different points of view. I thought it WAS right or wrong. Seems I’ve been guilty of English snobbery – I’m so ashamed!
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The only thing I’m certain about is the fact that I know very little.
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Me too. About me, I mean. At least I think that’s what I mean, but I can’t be sure.
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I know this is a great post. There one more thing I know.
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Thanks, Valentine. You’re a sweetie.
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The older I get, the less I know. That is the only thing I can count on.
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I guess if the only thing we learn in life is how much we still have to learn, that means we have learned something. Er….whuh?
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One of my favorite quotes is this: “The opposite of faith is not doubt– it’s certainty.” (From Anne Lamott.) As soon as we fist-poundingly believe something to be true, well, that’s the end of open-mindedness, open-heartedness, and true faith. Beautiful post, Peg. I hope it inspires people to keep their minds and hearts just a teensy bit more open moving forward.
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Love that quote, Dana. And keeping an open mind is something I have to constantly tell myself – dang brain has a tendency to clam up tighter than an irritated oyster.
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Amen to you!!!
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Thanks Susie.
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so true in my world.. what you said, not what blanket stupid statements from whoever you were talking to this week.
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“blanket stupid statements” – there seem to be a lot of those tossed around in life, hmm?
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hmm… did i make one?
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Not you! But lots of other people make them every day, don’t they?
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Peg, I loved this line: When I was younger I was sure of all sorts of things. As I’ve gotten older, however, I’ve come to know just how little I know.
I recognize that in myself also. I’m losing certainty with each year.
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We just need to hold on to a core of deeply held certainty so we can allow ourselves to experience the alternative rest of life, right Jackie?
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It is only the very young, usually teenagers, who know everything. Our knowledge seems to shrink with age. And I always say trust but verify. 🙂
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Maybe our knowledge shrinks, but we hope that our wisdom grows, don’t we?
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Some people believe they know everything. Some people believe they know little. I believe I’ll have another drink.
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That’s a belief system I can get behind!
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This is great advice. If people would stop being so darned sure of themselves, maybe they’d be able to learn something new.
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Some people are like bulldozers, their table-pounding, jaw-out-thrust opinions rolling right over those who admit to the possibilities of maybe.
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I DID drink a lot of Big Gulps, but not sure about Obama…. I’m pretty sure that “baby women” approve of the Republican stance on this issue…. I AM sure that the Lord somehow has me in the palm of His hand. Sometimes that is the only certainty that we are allowed to hold onto; everything else is greased up and ready to slip through our fingers.
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I guess that is the only certainty we NEED to hold onto. I know, with the help of His grace, you will pull through this stronger than ever. You’ll be like the Bionic Bill! Love you, Bro.
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Ditto that, Peg!
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Oh, my word, yes. Yes, yes, and more yes.
With a giggle for the parting video.
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You mean the commercial? You can never control those, but it’s eerie how often they jibe with the post, isn’t it?
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I think that if someone told me my brother gave himself cancer by drinking Coke, I’d be tempted to point out that many people have given themselves black eyes and broken noses by making rude insensitive statements.
I hope your brother is doing okay.
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They meant well. It was said with that same conviction that people tell you if you drink urine while dancing around under the first full moon of the year, you’ll never get the flu.
He was just diagnosed this week, so everybody’s still numb, but his prognosis is excellent.
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People are so funny. I like what you “know” at this stage of life. Too many only keep an open mind if the other’s mind is exactly the same as theirs….life could get very drab that way.
(Hang in there brother)
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Exactly! I have to fight the tendency to open my tiny mind only to those with whom I agree. Constant struggle.
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Good things come in tiny packages…(except cats. Don’t open you mind to a cat – even a tiny bit.)
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Of course you are right, the things I knew then for sure are now gray areas. But I would like to add that I do know other things better now than I did when I was 18. For instance, I now know when a jerk is a jerk, back then I might have thought some things cooler than I do now etc. I have never been sure about His part, but I am sure I’ll find out at some point. Other then that, I hope your brother is ok!
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You’re right, we can’t really know about Him. I thought long and hard before I put belief in God in the “know” category instead of the “believe”. It’s a conscious choice we either make or don’t make.
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Learning to have an open mind has been one of the hardest things I’ve had to do as I’ve gotten older, but it’s also helped me to become a lot more compassionate.
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So true. Being a parent, especially, was the most humbling, humanizing experience of my life. It makes you so vulnerable to others’ pain…which is a good and a bad thing, isn’t it?
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I think the epidemic of people speaking foolishly-but-with-conviction is compounded by the internet, where anyone can find some crap written by some boob substantiating their point of view. Speaking of which, look for my next post, coming soon, wherein I give credence to idiots.
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Haha! That’s just what I was thinking after your lofty first sentence…”you mean, like us?”
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“Maybe I…maybe all of us…should try to keep an open mind and an open heart. Just a little open.” — this is perfect. And knowing that there is not much that you know means that you actually do know everything.
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Yeah! There’s plenty of logic in that twisted sentence…somewhere. 😉
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Screw anyone who truly believes your brother causes his own cancer, Peg. As for Obama and the Republicans, I am amazed what people will spew out with absolute conviction. I know pretty much nothing, personally.
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Me neither, Weebs. Maybe it’s a sign of wisdom when we become aware of our own lack thereof?
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I think you know more than you think you know. Especially knowing when to say that you don’t know. You know what I mean? Good points you make here, Peg.
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I think I believe what you mean, and I hope to know more soon.
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I think it was Ronald Reagan who said of his political opponents, “It’s not that they’re ignorant. It’s just that they know so much that isn’t so.” (or something like that). That’s probably a good statement to keep in mind about absolutists outside of politics, too.
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Ha! Love it – that’s so true.
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Short, sweet and spot on.
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Thanks so much, John.
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I know nothing…”that’s my opinion…and I believe it!”…….hope I had enough conviction in that
response
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I would have believed you more had you pounded the table, Jim.
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I’m with you Peg. I probably have fewer “knows” than you but the rest is spot on.
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The older we get, the fewer “knows” there are, eh? What I know for sure is that I’m not as smart as I’ve always liked to think. Dang!
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Word!
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I also know you’re pretty cool and happenin’ in a far-out way because you know the lingo all the youngsters are using nowadays. Gadzooks!
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Heheheh, I’ve been looking for a spot to try that one out for years. Of course, as usual, by the time I use it correctly the lingo has changed.
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I was in a workshop which wrestled with the concept of EVIL this week. There were so many theological and cultural definitions and origins. One group even disputed the existence of evil. I was bewildered. How could there be so many differences and people who adamantly believed they held the only “truth” to the subject?
I remember the senseless bombing of the Alfred Pl Murrah building in OKC, I tried to make sense of it, but couldn’t.
I’ve finally come to the conclusion that there are many, many things that don’t make sense and that’s why I need God. Hope within the changing chaos.
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“Hope within the changing chaos” – great way to put it. And how nice to see your smiling avatar around the interwebz, Barb. How’ve you been?
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Peg, I’m sorry about your brother. That sucks. Your last paragraph is my mantra right now. We just lost a mom in our town to suicide and we’re all having a hard time with it. She had cancer and they believe the meds made her depressed… she jumped off a bridge. I don’t know much of anything anymore. Our kids are all friends. I’m just holding on to that belief. I wish you love and peace.
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Oh, how dreadfully sad! That’s so tough on the kids…and the other moms.
My brother, Bill, has an excellent prognosis, so we are very thankful. Our brother, Pat, however, died of a brain tumor years ago. Near the end he said that he had to believe that God had a plan – I hope I can be that brave when my time is at an end.
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