Flirting: Then & Now

La, sir, spare my blushes!

L’amour, toujour, l’amour.

As the French so eloquently and succinctly say, it is all about love.  And flirting has long been the delightful prelude to love.

In Victorian times, no properly brought up young lady’s education was complete without instruction in the gentle art of flirting with her fan.  The placement of the fan, how she wielded it – all sent signals.

“Will she or won’t she…” her suitor wondered, “dance the next quadrille with me?”

The flash of her eyes above a bit of lace and feathers could thrill the hopeful beau, or dash his hopes to pieces.

As I observed at the YMCA the other night, the gentle art of flirting is still practiced, with a few small differences.  A young lady still sends signals, but instead of a fan she now uses body language.  Literally.  Words embroidered on her clothing send a subtle message for the discriminating suitor to interpret.

“What” her eager swain puzzles, “can be the meaning of these words emblazoned across the tiny bit of Lycra clinging to her, er, um, booty? junk in the trunk? badonkadonk?”  The message printed across her nether cheeks read:

                             “Pinch me”

La, sir..meet me in the locker room for a quickie.

Will she or won’t she…? I’d say she probably will.

Whether speaking with a fan or a skin-tight a** covering, woman continues to whisper to man – the subtle language of love.  Or not too subtle.  The message was about as subtle as a sledgehammer in this particular case, but still.  You get my drift.

Ah, l’amour.

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About pegoleg

R-A-M-B-L-I-N-G-S, Ram...Blin!
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73 Responses to Flirting: Then & Now

  1. Seasweetie says:

    I do believe you’ve inspired a post in me, peg. And I am proud to say that my daughter dead out refuses to wear any text emblazoned on her buttockal regions.

    Like

  2. dorannrule says:

    Plunging necklines and tattoos work wonders too – in today’s art of subtle flirting. What have we come to? I love this post and thanks so much for sharing! 🙂

    Like

  3. Go Jules Go says:

    So…instead of fans we use our fannies. What’s the problem?

    Tee hee hee. Sorry. I had to.

    I’m glad you wrote about this. The words on the toosh really bother me. The seaside shops in NJ sell some REAL gems, as I’m sure you can imagine. Hmm. Perhaps I found my next giveaway… 😉

    Like

    • pegoleg says:

      Tee hee is right – wish I’d had that as the tag line.

      I am seriously considering marketing T-shirts to benefit cancer research that say Cancer Can Kiss My Ass, but I keep thinking about all the little children in the world who can read. Let’s try to spare them, shall we, people?

      Like

      • Go Jules Go says:

        Actually, I think that’s a GREAT idea! I think I told you about the breast cancer fundraiser t-shirts my friends made that said, “Arghh you can take my booty, but leave me chest alone” and there was a picture of a pirate’s chest. Still one of my favorite t-shirts!

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        • pegoleg says:

          I LOVE that shirt! But there aren’t any bad words on it. I’m not sure I’m ready for my ass to be in everyone’s face…wait a minute, that came out wrong.

          Like

    • *giggle*

      As Peg said, this would’ve been a great tagline!

      I prefer to rely on my wit. (There’s probably a reason I didn’t date much, eh?)

      Like

  4. bigsheepcommunications says:

    Oh, so they’re flirting. I just thought they were hopelessly tacky with no particular agenda in mind.

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  5. k8edid says:

    The placement of my fan and how I wield it depends entirely on whether or not I am having yet another freakin’ hot flash….I simply must be more careful…

    I detest clothing with words on it – especially tacky stuff.

    And do people still flirt? I’ve been in a monotonous, er, um I mean monogamous relationship for so long I can’t even remember flirting…

    Like

    • pegoleg says:

      My sister Tar uses a fan for those flashes, too. Maybe you can both work on the flirty eyes to go with it, so your sweeties will read your message and say “you got something in your eye?”

      Like

        • Ha Ha! Laughed out loud, Katy. I have a collection of fold fans from mydays in Japan. That was before I needed to have one with me all the time for the blasted hot flashes.
          When school starts some young ladies will be wearing very tight, unbecoming clothes, some harboring the not so subtle script you outlined above. And then there’s the way too short shorts – to school!
          Modesty is a principle many of our youth have no clue about.

          Like

        • k8edid says:

          Here in Florida some of the students wear very little to class. I am sometimes amazed, sometimes just dumbfounded at what passes for acceptable wear in public. But then again, I’m an old grandma.

          Like

    • hm. Note to self: buy frilly fan for hot flashes.
      Course, I’d probably use the fan to hit Jim upside the head when he tells me it’s not that hot in here.

      Like

  6. This is why Victorian fan moves aren’t nearly as effective as they were pre-booty shorts.

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  7. notquiteold says:

    I’m gonna get me some of those! I mean the fan and the pinch-me pants. Imagine the results when I use them TOGETHER!

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  8. Oh, ain’t love grand?

    Speaking of grand…I have the luxury of owning an extra-wide badonkadonk, so I’m capable of sending men signals with entire paragraphs.

    Like

  9. I shall ask my man tonight if he would prefer me to lure him to the bedroom with some gentle fanning, or some tight ass pants spelling out exactly what I want him to do. I fear I know the answer…

    Like

    • pegoleg says:

      Well, jeez, Vanessa, now that you’ve got him there’s no need for all that subtlety, but in the “getting to know you” phase…maybe a little bit of mystery is OK?

      Like

      • Yes, the trouble is though, men are quite…I won’t say ‘simple’, I’ll say ‘straightforward’, they don’t always understand subtlety, so actually maybe the modern way makes more sense, the instructions are printed on the women’s clothes so the men don’t have to try and figure out what’s expected of them.

        Like

  10. SO that’s what I’m doing wrong. Thanks Peg! I’ll ditch my fan and stitch my britches. 😉

    Like

  11. mj monaghan says:

    Oh shoot, Meg-O-Lamb, I just got a badonkadonk pair of shorts with print across and it was able to accommodate the entire beginning of the opening from Star Wars:

    In a galaxy, far, far away …

    Like

  12. Hey. Me again. I just had to resubscribe to your blog. Again. Hopefully the 267th time’s the charm.

    Like

  13. I’ve got a T-shirt that says “Read Me” across my manly pecs. Sadly most people quit reading after the word “read”

    Like

  14. pattisj says:

    Aw, c’mon, you KNOW they don’t read the instructions!

    Like

  15. Sandy Sue says:

    Sigh. I miss the old days when T-shirts were the sex billboard. Such finesse! Such subtlety! Soon we won’t need to wear clothes at all. The flirt, the promotion, and the act all simultaneous. Such a time-saver!

    Like

  16. mistyslaws says:

    It is a past time of mine to sit in court, waiting until my turn to call a case, and read the messages printed not only on the people’s clothing, but on their skin as well. And being as they are in a respectable court of law, of course they wear the most skin baring clothing that they own. So it allows for LOTS of reading material.

    And I am with all of the above regarding the length of message that could be printed on my very own ample bottom. Probably the entire text of the Bill of Rights or Constitution. Maybe at least then, I’d get a smart man!

    Like

    • pegoleg says:

      Misty, I think you’re on to something here. Bottom messages for the thinking person “Four score and seven years ago…”

      People watching is a fascinating/terrifying occupation, isn’t it?

      Like

  17. I’ve got to get myself one of those fans.

    Like

  18. Angie Z. says:

    Noooooooooooo! Horrible! That slut! Where’d she buy those? I mean, I’m just wondering….for research purposes.

    Like

  19. Dana says:

    So you’re saying that I should donate my “I will dance the next quadrille with you” booty shorts to the thrift store? Darn it! I thought they were so subtle…

    Like

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