It’s time, once more, for a thrill-a-minute roller coaster ride through my brain. A toilet paper roll-er coaster. Hang on.
and….she’s off!
Men and women may look at the same world, but they do not see the same things.
Men tend to be linear thinkers who concentrate on one job until it is done. Women multitask like a pack of hamsters on speed in a room full of running wheels.
I’m not saying one way is better than the other – they’re just different. I also realize there are exceptions to every rule, and I don’t pretend to represent every woman. Nonetheless, I suspect this will sound very familiar to both the XY and XX chromosomed.
Now that we’ve got the disclaimers out of the way…
The following is a true and faithful account of an actual event, which was experienced by me and my brain while spending quality time in my bathroom.
Peg-o-Leg's Ramblings 
I think you forgot something…
Oh yea…research refacing the kitchen cabinets. New drawer pulls. And maybe some of those slide-out shelves…they’re really neat.
Oh..damn. I keep forgetting to look at methods to hang my pots & pans instead of just having them shoved in a drawer. The kitchen window would be nice to suspend them in, as it’s a very deep window well. Will shower curtain rods (if I can find them small enough…what’s the overall dimension of that window-well again…must dig out the tape measure) hold up to the weight of some of the heavier stainless steel pans?
Must get replacements for the older non-stick pans that no longer non-stick things. Where am I gonna find the money for that with the emergency room bill I just got for that damn kidney stone.
Almost out of potassium citrate – find more locally, or another purchase at Amazon?
That’s right…am running low on the bentonite clay ‘toothpaste’…off to Amazon I go.
Wait…what was I saying?
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Yikes! You’ve got it worse than I do. How about adding “Form support group” to your to-do list?
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Hahahaha 😂😂
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teeheehee!
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Brilliant and soooo true! 🙂
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It’s a wonder we ever get anything done.
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You need one of those automatic toilet paper replacers. We have one at our house. It works great. I’ve never seen it but I’ll have my wife let you know where she got it.
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I love this, Al.
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LOL! So well written!
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Thanks so much.
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I remember when you wrote this and how difficult it was for that stunning flow-chart.
Another gem of yours, Peg! Have a fabulous weekend!
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It’s one of my faves. Happy weekend to you!
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Plus, we never, ever, ever have to wait in a line.
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Like, ever.
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That is one feature of guyness that we ladies heartily resent. Like, always.
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Surely there must be others! Many others, I would think! How about our uncanny ability to achieve *ahem* satisfaction so quickly and easily and then fall right to sleep. Ha. You wish.
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No, that’s one feature we find either annoying or uninteresting. Meh.
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Hilarious! And so true. But these days, somewhere between the bathroom and kitchen, I’d forget why I was going to the kitchen.
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As long as you don’t get to the kitchen and think you’re in the bathroom.
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This is brilliant!! Absolutely love it and totally 100% agree with all of this. Thank you for making me laugh 🙂
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No, thank YOU.
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No wonder we are tired!!!
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Seriously. It’s a wonder we can function at all!
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Hilarious – I also have 3 rolls ‘on-standby’!
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It’s only sensible.
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PERFECTLY captured. That multitasking we do is called ‘mental loading’. It’s a ‘thing’ that can be studied. Women carry waaaaaay more mental load than men in the home, and you’ve just drawn yours out PERFECTLY
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I didn’t know there was a name for it. I saw a program once that studied this phenomenon and it was fascinating – we really are different.
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I’ve stumbled into your blog for the first time just now and I feel like you are reading my mind. You aren’t are you?
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Of course not! And no, you do NOT look fat in those jeans.
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I’m just thinking how expensive life would be in MY house if I engaged in home repairs every time I had to change the toilet paper!
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Hahaha! Maybe we need to put blinders on our brains?
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And lower limits on our credit cards!
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This morning I’d been working for ages trying to connect my phone to my computer and needed a bathroom break so I went to the toilet in the spare bathroom where I noticed there was only one spare toilet roll. That reminded me that there were no spare rolls at all in our ensuite. I went to the laundry to get more toilet rolls but bumped into the basket full of dirty washing I’d put there earlier on my way out to feed the dogs.
I put the dirty white socks in a bucket to soak then started putting the rest of the washing into the machine when I remembered that there were some stains on a couple of shirts. I put stain remover on the spots then put the clothes into the machine.
I collected toilet rolls from the laundry cupboard then restocked both toilets.
I laughed as I remembered your post which I read a few days ago.
Your posts are always fun to read.
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We have seen the enemy, and she is us. Thanks for the kind comment.
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This is the most comprehensive illustrative guide to the intricacies of a woman’s mind that I have ever seen. Allow me to demonstrate my own chain of thought whilst I was reading it:
* It must have taken ages to make all those little text boxes and arrows
* Was it Microsoft Word?
* How did she get that all on one page?
* I should really bump up my Word skills
* She’s got an awful lot of dedication for her blog
* I should blog more often
* I’ve been so lax in the past couple of years, I’m never going to increase my readership if I don’t blog more regularly
* It’s because I spend too much time at the pub
* I’d love a glass of wine
* This is why you can’t lose weight, it’s because you drink too much
* Right, I’m going to start exercising really hard
* Oh, hah, she sends the reader back up to top again to the toilet roll, clever.
This must be why we are tired all the time.
Very pleased to have discovered you! 🙂
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Oh man, it’s like those pictures of someone looking in a mirror, reflecting them looking in a mirror, reflecting a mirror and on and on. My head hurts!
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That sounds about right to me. Yet, for some reason, he will still be in there longer than me.
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While you’re considering how best to organize your life and what it all means, he’s considering the sports pages. THAT takes some time.
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