It’s time again for a thrill-a-minute roller coaster ride through my brain. A toilet paper roll-er coaster. Hang on.
Men and women do not see the same world.
Men tend to be linear thinkers who concentrate on one job until it is done. We women multitask so much we’re like a pack of hamsters on speed in a room full of running wheels.
I’m not saying one vision is better than the other – they’re just different. I also don’t pretend to represent every woman. Nonetheless, I suspect this will sound familiar to many of the double-X-chromosomed.
Now that we’ve got the disclaimers out of the way…
The following is a true and faithful account of an actual event, which was experienced by me and my brain while spending quality time in my bathroom.
Peg-o-Leg's Ramblings 
This is great – well done! Sounds about right for most of us. 🙂
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Thanks.
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Gosh! That happens all the time! When I’m out of paper in my bathroom, I check my hubby’s as well. I then see his bathroom needs cleaning and all that stuff… Waaaaahhg!
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You’re a good wifey.
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I do try. Or I can just let it go…
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Did you write this with me in mind?? Sometimes I feel like I can’t get a darn thing done during the day because I start one task and a trail of bread crumbs leads me, willy nilly, all over the place to a dozen other things. 🙂
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I can soooo relate. Multi-tasking run amok.
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Ha! I can sooo relate to this.
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I hoped I wasn’t alone in this.
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Yep. That about sums it up. Men. They have no idea whey it is so much harder to be a woman.
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It’s so nice to hear from you! There really are basic differences, aren’t there?
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Did you find my glasses while you were out and about restructuring the kitchen, the 401K, the parents condo, the paper-products shopping list, and fixing the world’s problems?
Oh yea…they’re on my face…
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I didn’t find your glasses, but they may be in the utility drawer that I can’t get open.
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Roller coaster ride? More like a trip around the solar system. Now I know where that maxim “pee or get off the pot” originated.
Your linear pal, Al
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Are you more linear, Al? Most stereotypes have their roots in fact, but not all.
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Oh yes, I’m the quintessential linear thinker, not good at multitasking (a trait I truly admire in you female types). I will work on a problem non-stop for hours or days until it is solved, never thinking for a moment about any adjunct issues that might or might not be involved. That would deter me from the task at hand.
Patty is exactly like you. If I were to say let’s take the garbage cans out to the curb, I would have mine done in sheer seconds. Patty would take forever. First she would stop at every bush to see if it needed trimming or fertilizing. Next she would look at the under-trim to see if was in need of painting. Then she would spend a few minutes trying to decide if she wanted to change the paint color on the shutters. That, of course, would be after contemplating if she really does like the new tiles we had put on the front porch or do they clash a bit with the stone work after all. Then I would see her thinking, should we use mulch again this year for the landscaping of go with pine straw? Meanwhile, the garbage in her can would reach it’s half-life and become 100 per cent compost with steam rising from the lid. An explosion would be imminent unless we quickly spread it around the garden area. Tell me, is there a support group for this mindset?
Never mind, I think I’ll just continue to say “yes dear, we’ll talk about all this tomorrow.”
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You’re a good man, Al. And tell her I said those tiles look just fine with the stone work.
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That is why I have a sudoku riddle on my toilet – to never, ever go down that path …
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I’ve started doing that, too, but those are frustrating to me. The easy are too easy and the hard are too hard.
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Oh, just get on with the hard ones, one day you will find those not as hard …
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Yeah, but at some point you would run out of sudokus in the bathroom and will have to go through two versions of this chart: one for toilet paper and one for sudoku riddles.
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Well, I might run out of toilet paper – but I hardly ever forget to put a new sudoku riddle into my bathroom.
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I prefer to do one job at a time, but I’m often not granted the luxury. Enjoyed your thought tree as always. Thanks for making me laugh. 🙂
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You’re the exception, Carrie. I always thought you were exceptional.
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Hehe.
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And now I have to go to the bathroom!
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So glad to inspire you!
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LOL – Can’t wait to share this with my mom and bachelor brother – who, we we call from town closest to his place with a “we’re almost there, need anything from town?” and he says, “Yeah, you might want to pick up some TP” – and I look over the prices, buy the big savings pack, we arrive – I carry it in, and he drily comments, “Great! The toilet paper fairy strikes again! – That’s got to be, a two? three year supply?” 🙂
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I admire how smart you are to call ahead. Just think of the horrors of running out of TP during your visit!
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🙂 Learned vicariously via Mom sharing her ‘first visit’ to the new place – years ago! LOL
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I remember this post. I’ll use it as a reminder to refill the toilet paper, because we’re not financially ready to invest into a condo in Florida, and spending a few bucks on TP can prevent hundreds of thousands in real estate and other expenses.
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Good point. The less time spent cogitating on the throne the better off you’ll be.
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Looooooool love this!
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Sound familiar?
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Well put haha
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Soooo true. (Naturally love the go chart)
It’s just like when Staff,Too says “Ready to go to the store/wherever and picks up the car keys tapping toes while I dash around the house closing and locking windows and doors, turning off appliances….making sure the dog and cat have water and nothing to choke on while we are gone, turning off the sprinkler…well, the endless list of must do before leaving things goes on and on…usually ending with cleaning up the crumbs and dishes as he’s gotten bored and decided to snack while waiting…
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A favorite cartoon shows a husband and wife standing by the front door with 2 kids running around in circles behind them. He’s already got his coat and hat on, and she says, “How about this time YOU get the kids ready, and I sit in the car and honk the horn?”
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I need that one for sure!
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For the last time; there is NO SUCH THING as multi-tasking. It’s a myth. It simply cannot be done. It’s a proven FACT! All tasks suffer. I offer this post as proof positive.
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It’s ok. Breathe. Good air in, bad air out. Good air in, bad air out. Ahhh. Calm. Peace.
🙂
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Ommmm. Ommmm.
Ah. That’s better. I owe you.
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🙂
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Thanks for talking him down, Dana.
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Sure you can multitask. If I have more to do than i possibly can, everything gets done well. Give me one simple task and I will screw it up completely.
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I think that’s true, Elyse. We evolved to stir the pot of sabre tooth tiger stew, make sure Little Oog doesn’t fall into the fire and keep bats out of the cave all at the same time, while the cavemen were out, single-mindedly focused on bagging another tiger before it bagged them.
Different strengths needed.
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There is a TP holder that I need to be tightened or replaced, but I have avoided it for the longest time thinking about this chart. I just don’t think I can afford that Allen wrench to tighten it! You probably think I am making this up.
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Go ahead – treat yourself to a new Allen wrench. What girl doesn’t want one?
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My heart is a-flutter!
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OMG! How did you get inside my brain? You totally nailed it.
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It’s scary, isn’t it?
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You are right on!
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Thanks!
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Oh my, how true it is. No wonder women are worn out just going to the bathroom. Going to repost…must share this insightful piece.
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Thanks for the repost!
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Reblogged this on that little voice and commented:
I love Peg’s posts and this one is right on. Makes me d just thinking about a visit to the bathroom!
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BANG ON.
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Sounds like you can relate?
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Definitely.
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Now, if you get one of those “self-cleaning” bidet/toilets, problem solved. 🙂
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Nah, that would go off and start self-cleaning while I was sitting on it, just like the auto=flush toilets. I’d probably get scalded.
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i was reeeaaally curious to see how that would end
was not disappointed
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Whenever I try to ponder the great mysteries of life, the mundane intrudes.
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As is ordained haha
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I loved the diagram!!! That itself was a bit of genius.
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If I told you how many hours I spent cutting and pasting that, since I have no computer skills, you would think I am nuts.
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I’d have to do the same thing, Peg, to come up with that drawing. Well done!
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The trouble is, every one of your different options triggered a whole different path of thoughts for me, and I then had to go back and move on to the next box, for the same thing to happen again. That’s why it’s taken me four days to read this post.
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I hate when that happens.
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Always loved this one, Peg. You truly do capture the non-stop flow of to dos that keep me awake in the middle of the night. 🙂
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This is one of my faves. Hope all is good with you, sissy.
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Haha. I love this! There is a book called: “If I Get Hit by a Bus Tomorrow, Here’s How to Replace the Toilet Paper Roll: A Woman’s Instructional Guide for Men.” I think if I went away for a month, I’d come back and find that he’d been using paper towels and ziploc bags for toilet paper rather than driving to the store to buy some!
Stephanie
http://stephie5741.blogspot.com
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The ziploc mental image is disturbing…and very, very possible. I love the title of that book!
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