Know Thyself
Little Billy wanted a pony for Christmas. It was all he talked about for months. When Christmas morning arrived, he ran outside and saw…a huge pile of poop. Little Billy clapped his hands for joy and started shoveling.
“Why are you so happy?” his mom asked, perplexed.
“Because,” Little Billy laughed “With all that poop, there has to be a pony under here somewhere!”
Little Billy is a dewy-eyed optimist. How about you?
Take this simple test to determine where you fall on the Optopessimistometer.
A) You see a glass that is partially filled with liquid. You think:
1) the glass is half full.
2) the glass is half empty.
3) who left that damn glass there, and why is it always MY job to clean up around here?
B) The direction our country is heading in is troubling. You:
1) are confident that opposing parties can reach across the aisle to solve the nation’s problems.
2) figure that all politicians are for sale.
3) are willing to reach across the aisle to the opposing party to solve the nation’s problems…if the price is right.
C) You come upon a car accident. You:
1) rush to see if you can help, hoping nobody was hurt.
2) think, “Thank goodness I didn’t come through here two minutes earlier; that would have been me.”
3) say, “Get that ambulance out of the road – some of us have places to go!”
D) Your friend needs a transplant. You:
1) immediately get tested to be a donor, praying that you will be a match.
2) share the statistics that even if the operation is successful, there’s a 50-50 chance he’ll die from organ rejection, infection or sponges left in during surgery.
3) start a black-market business to exploit the untapped need for body parts.
E) Spring has sprung. Soon:
1) colorful flowers will burst into bloom after their long winter’s nap.
2) your car will need daily washing because of all the mud.
3) you won’t be able to get into a grocery store on a Saturday without shoving aside Little Leaguers, cheerleaders, and blind kids who are all trying to shake you down with overpriced candy.
Add up each answer’s allotted points and check your score against this handy classification guide:
- 5- 7 points: Pollyanna: You are a classic optimist. Your “every cloud has a silver lining” attitude makes people want to vomit. Take off those rose-colored glasses before you run into something.
- 8-11 points: Eeyore: You are a classic pessimist. In other words, a realist. Your “it’ll never work” attitude will save you from a lifetime of disappointment
- 12-15 point: Grinch: You are a self-absorbed, anti-social, uber-pessimist. Your “what’s in it for me” attitude makes you a natural for public office.
Peg-o-Leg's Ramblings 
I’m just barely a Polyanna — I guess that means not quite-full frontal nudity?
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I’m firmly in the Eeyore camp, but I have delusions of Pollyanna.
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Thank you for this! You started my miserable rainy Thursday with a smile. Of course, if I’m happy in the morning that means something bad will happen later to balance the day out. Thanks a lot. Sincerely, Eeyore
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It’s only logical.
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Well, I’m off the chart. My first thought was “I am not taking a #$%@ quiz”. I’m still in resentful voter mode. And it’s morning. Before coffee.
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But it’s a really, really short quiz.
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I’m sub-Grinch in the morning, but I still enjoyed your post.
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A quiz? Bah humbug! Booooo! Grrrrr! Oh bother!!
Well, let’s see…it’s dark at 4 pm now…I’m constantly freezing now that fall’s here…Christmas commercials are on…I’d say I’m leaning more toward the Grinch. But there’s hope yet, I don’t have to cook Thanksgiving dinner this year, wahooo! So I’m optimistic my family will enjoy a good meal for once.
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“oh bother” – tee hee.
I am cooking this year, which I actually don’t mind, as in secretly love. It’s the house cleaning that gets me down. 😦
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I am a Pollyanna!! Because I wake up and it feels like Christmas every day!!!!!!!
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Usually I dislike Pollyannas, but it looks good on you, Susie.
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I liked the post very much. I am a Pollyanna, no surprise there and my hubby is an Eeyore. I was pleasantly surprised at his as I figured he was a Grinch. Lol
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There you go, looking on the bright side again.
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One borderline Pollyanna/Eeyore depending on whether I answered before or after coffee. 😀
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The coffee makes all the difference.
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Call me Eeyore! I am so damn realistic now, it’s depressing! I don’t trust anyone or anything and I think there’s a catch to everything! “Psst”…is my favorite expression, replacing “never give up”. Oh how I love aging… 🙂
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Oh no! I would have classified you as a Pollyanna. We need to keep it real, but “never give up” is also a good slogan, so keep that one, too, OK?
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You mean you would have “pegged” me as a Pollyanna? LOL. I used to be her, I swear. She got burned too many times though and she lost her umph! Eeyore crawled right in and took over. I’m working on bringing my Pollyanna back, damn it!
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Oh crap, I’m an Eeyore. But just barely, so that should count for something…
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You’re looking on the bright side, Carrie. True Eeyores never do that.
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I think the quiz is wrong. .. at least in your case!
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Weeeeeell, I can be a bit of a pessimist. Or as I like to call it: a realist. 🙂
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Well we’d make for good… realistic company!
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Exactly – a bit of pessimism is realistic.
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I like to call myself an Optimistic Realist. 🙂
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You can call yourself whatever you like, although most of us Eeyores think WE are more realistic.
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I never get my hopes up, so I never get let down~Eeyore (makes sense, right?)
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Makes perfect sense to me.
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My hope gets kicked in the crotch daily, however, after a good ice-baggin’ (frozen peas works great), I’m right back to seeing rainbows and unicorns in everything. I don’t know if I can call myself a Pollyanna, but I’m definitely a couple of steps above Realist. NEVER a pessimist, even in the most dire circumstances, though my family is replete with them. Zaps too much of my mental energy and life is short enough as it is.
Nice post, as usual, Peg-O. I do hope you’re enjoying the fall season! So…where are you on the scale? On B, where would I score if I reached across the aisle to punch someone in the chops?
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I’m an Eeyore, Shannon. If you did reach across the aisle and punch somebody, you could still be a Pollyanna, but you would be in jail. “Pollyanna Behind Bars” – kinds sounds like a porno.
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It looks like it’s time for me to start tapping some PACs for some campaign backing! In the words of the incredible Temptations; “Vote for me and I’ll set you free!”
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1pointGrinch for president!
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I can never figure out if I’m an optimistic pessimist or a pessimistic optimist. There is definitely some of both flowing through my brains.
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I’m the same way. Although if you have “brains”, plural, things should be looking pretty bright for you.
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How much do you think I could get for my left kidney?
P.S. Definition of a pessimist: “An optimist with experience.”
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Love that definition. And most of my buyers prefer the right kidney.
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I’m an optimistic cynic (or a cynical optimist, depending on what day you ask) – so I am frequently disappointed by my fellow man, but I expected to be. I think that makes me an Eeyore.
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I think so, too.
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I didn’t like any of the choices. What does that make me? 😉
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Smarter than the average bear.
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I like that answer!
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Pollyanna here, even when it feels like all hope is lost.
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Good for you! I have to fight my Eeyore tendencies every day.
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I feel like Lorna about not fitting into the choices. I do see a lot of Anne of Green Gables in me…same orphan genre as Pollyanna, but not always playing the “glad game.”
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I love Anne of Green Gables! That was my favorite book series when I was about 11. So you’re generally positive and a bit of a drama queen, eh?
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Wow, I’m late to the game. I like Al’s definition of an optimist. Just like you, have to battle the negative nanny in me, especially when it’s 21 degrees outside. Brrrr…..
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Hey, I was sitting here with this screen up while I was on the phone with a client – what timing! I’m rather absent from the game as well, lately. Busy, busy with Obamacare (curse that ship and all who sail in her.) Stay warm, sissy.
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One point away from being a Pollyanna. It was the organ donation question that threw me off. (I like to help out, but not usually THAT MUCH.) That, and the car accident one (I would both rush to help and be thankful that I wasn’t there two minutes earlier.) I don’t mind being sort of realistic with a rosy outlook. Best of both worlds, yes?
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Ughhh….. this test looks too hard. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to pass it.
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You can do it! You’ll be swell! The sun will come up…tomorrow! Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow…they’ll be sun.
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If I don’t get off the internet right now, the sun will come up today.
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