Some sights you see while sightseeing in the summer.
In the winter, the geese fly south.
In the spring, the swallows return to Capistrano.
In the summer…in the summer…I can’t think of anything involving birds that means summer is here. Instead I’ve got my…
Top 10 Signs that Summer Has Arrived
10) Swimsuit season is here. I’m spared the agony of trying any of them on because all the stores got rid of their summer stuff a month ago. “Back to school” wool pants and sweaters are now on display.
9) Children everywhere are thrilled to be free of school and planning a summer full of fun activities. After 2 days their chief activity is whining, “I’m bored! There’s nothing to do!” 50 times a day. Like prisoners about to be paroled, their parents start counting down the number of days until they return to school.
8) I stop nagging my husband about the $800 snow blower that was broken so the driveway wasn’t shoveled all winter. I start in about the $900 riding lawn mower that is up on blocks in the barn.
7) My 1-month gardening honeymoon ends. Most plants have succumbed to aphids or blight. Those still hanging on are doomed to death by either too much or too little sun.
6) Teachers everywhere are thrilled to be free of school and planning a summer full of fun activities. After 2 days the looming specter of going back casts a shadow over all that fun. Like condemned prisoners on death row, they start counting down the number of days until they return to school.
5) It is impossible to transact business anywhere in the continental USA after 2 pm on a Friday because everyone is either on flextime or taking the afternoon off.
4) Fattening diet bombs like deep-dish pizza and brownies no longer bother me. I only want light foods and drinks when it’s hot outside. Fattening diet bombs like frozen daiquiris, margaritas and anything Ben & Jerry’s explode around me.
3) The library, the YMCA, the city pool and a host of other places switch to summer hours. This insures that those of us who pay to support these facilities won’t be able to actually use them, as they will be closed when we get off work.
2) Everywhere you look people have thrown off bulky sweaters and coats, adopting a summer uniform of shorts, tube tops and bathing suits. The vast number of people wearing these skimpy outfits who should NEVER do so makes me yearn for crows to peck my eyes out.
1) We sit on our deck at twilight and marvel at the eerie, glowing light that can only be seen at this time of year; that which is given off by my ghostly pale, winter legs in shorts.
Peg-o-Leg's Ramblings 
Nice list, Pegoleg! I know what you mean with people wearing clothes that are way too tight and unbecoming, making us want to poke our eyes out. Or, tell them to put on something that fits!
Have a great weekend 🙂
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Everybody can wear what they like but for goodness sake – check out a mirror before venturing out in public!
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I can identify with that gardening honeymoon. My garden continues to thrive (no aphids here), but the weeds are thriving, too, as I lie on the porch swing and read.
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I like your kind of gardening.
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How many days until fall?
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Come on; I’m sure you’ve loving having the kids around the house! Especially when they all go away on vacation and leave you in blessed solitude.
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Well, yeah, but how many days til fall?
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I’ve had the air conditioner running since February…I do not know what season it is becase we only have hot and hotter here. Oh wait, there is hot and dry OR hot and humid. my bad.
I find myself wishing my vision would fail even quicker…Florida has a dress code all it’s own involving and abundance of exposed hideous feet and pastel capri pants with embellished old lady tops, preferably with flowers and/or birds on them.
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I am so torn about capris. They really are a lifesaver for us women of a certain age – shorts can be too short, and long pants don’t say summer. But the way you describe them…we’re not THAT old, Katy!
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I know, I kid about them a lot…I do wear them myself but sometimes when I see them on people I shudder…
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I chuckled over your entry for kids declaring their boredom by Day 2 of summer break because true to your prediction, my almost 9-yr old whined to that effect on Day 1. I gritted my teeth and told her to play outside.
And wow, gosh, re summer attire. It sure does make me yearn for the snow-blower weather.
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I guess you just have to remind yourself that you were whining the same thing back in the day. You did the right thing by sending her out to play.
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The world is ending is all I can say. 80’s in winter in Chicagoland is proof. Now we have an overabundance of insects that never died like they should have. Mosquitos in February. Sigh.
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I’m with you. What happened to mild spring with some rain?
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Truth!
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…and consequences. Especially when I don’t resist my two worst enemies – Ben and Jerry.
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Ha ha! All so true. My legs could definitely give yours a run for the money and make the Cullens proud.
“This insures that those of us who pay to support these facilities won’t be able to actually use them, as they will be closed when we get off work.” AMEN!!! I actually have the option of summer hours, but can’t bear the thought of hanging around a whole extra hour Mon-Thurs for a half day on Fri. Seriously regretting THAT decision right about now… 😉
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I hear you. I console myself with the thought that even though we are working on a Friday afternoon in the summer. nobody is actually working very hard.
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And if you have a day off, you can’t get in the pool anyway, standing room only!
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And would you really want to get in there when you consider what those millions of screaming, splashing kids have been DOING in that pool? Not enough chlorine in the world.
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You are SO right about that!
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Great list! I would offer a prelude to that list. While you are baring those winter white legs on the front porch, they will be attacked by swarms of mosquitos!
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Ain’t THAT the truth. That’s why a handyman is starting work next week on something I have always wanted – a little screened in porch. I cannot wait!
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My kids are learning the hard way never to say “I’m bored” around me. I have no trouble finding things for them to do: laundry to fold, dishes to dry & put away or wash up, beds to be made, made beds to be stripped & linens washed…the list is never ending!
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My mother had the same response – good for you!
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Too many people have let the batteries run out on their talking mirrors, or they scrapped the talking mirror and went with the fun house ones that make a dwarf look like an NBA center.
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Good point. My talking mirror works just fine, but I bought the Evil Queen Deluxe model, so all it ever says is that I’m the fairest of them all.
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Wait a minute. Legs are supposed to glow in the dark, aren’t they? My husband always says mine do. I always took it to be a compliment.
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Comes in handy when the lights go out.
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Who needs a night light?
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Upon first seeing the picture at the top of your post, I was going to say something about the resulting condition of my eyes, but then thought it better not to… But then I read your #2 sign that summer has arrived, and I saw that you said something similar to what I was going to say, so at least I know that we agree, and without me saying something that might get a guy in trouble.
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It’s a sad fact of summer that some people who wear short-shorts…shouldn’t.
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I relate to nearly all on the list (my “whining and hitting” jar now has more than $20 in it). However, #7? Really?? Oh, Peg-O, the dirt diva girl can help you with this. Give me a chance. Let me show you how to be lazy AND have a garden. Don’t give up!
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Do you make house calls? That’s the kind of help I need. Today the workmen will be digging up the one, tiny little plot of garden I have that does well, to do some foundation work. Sigh.
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Aw, foundation work…that is NOT a good thing no matter how you slice it, especially that you’re losing a a working garden for it.
I would love to make a house call! (It’s more fun that way.) But really, I don’t do anything special, aside from improving the soil (with organic matter, compost, compost-ables, no chemicals). Check out my latest garden update http://wp.me/p28k6D-td. Lazy gardening is all about the soil and the microcosm beneath the surface — who does all the work for you. It is totally working for me.
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I disagree with the teachers counting the days till school starts-we just got out and I’m loving it. Maybe I don’t count because I’m a teacher’s aide. Glad to hear you are starting your screened in porch! Good blog.
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OK, you’re above average. You don’t start the “dread” countdown until August. Hope you’re feeling fine!
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I’m trying my darndest NOT to do the reverse countdown – where I start thinking “Oh, two weeks already gone…” Stop The Madness!
How long will it take to do the prep/repair work and complete the screened porch? That will be awesome!
What’s up with WP? Monday afternoon and they still haven’t changed the home page.
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I was kind of thinking of you when I wrote that. It’s the old glass is half full/half empty dilemma, isn’t it?
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I wonder if a person who is squeezed into an outfit that it way too small and unflattering looks in the mirror before leaving the house and thinks, “Damn, I look good.”
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I don’t know. I do think when we look at ourselves that’s all we see – the same old selves we have always seen, without seeing what we really look like to others.
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I swear this didn’t appear in my reader…what the heck? Is that a sign of summer? The hamsters that run on the WordPress wheel are off vacationing at Six Flags?
I am partial to #4. I love to cook but when it’s 90 degrees it feels like sandwich dinner night.
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You hit the nail on the head with WP – everybody’s on vacation! I couldn’t get my reader or the front page of WP for several days. I ended up having to switch browsers from Internet Explorer to Firefox. I hate technology.
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You forgot one (at least true for my neck of the woods): you step outside & are suddenly covered in tiny itchy bumps 5 seconds later as you suddenly realize you forgot to put the bug spray on. darn mosquitoes. I think I’m starting to like the smell of bug spray.
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Oh, jeez, you’re right. I can’t stand putting on bug spray, but you’ll get carried off by bugs without it. The workmen came out this morning to start work on my screen porch – yippee!
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I’m totally giving you the stink-eye right now…so jealous of your (soon to be) screened in porch.
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I can’t believe how far they got in just one day – the floor joists and corner posts are in. I can totally see where I’ll put my daybed for lazy afternoon book readings! Wish I’d remembered to do a before picture.
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Hahaha…
you’ll never have to worry about adding me to your No. 2 list, Peg. I HATE wearing shorts… even if I’m at the beach. I could be on the face of the sun and I wouldn’t do that to other folks… who were… somehow also… wondering about on the face of the sun.
🙂
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Smart move wearing long pants – you’d probably get a nasty burn wearing shorts on the face of the sun. I hope you would at least offer a cold beverage to the other people strolling on the face of the sun.
I tried on my bathing suit the other day, thinking after having lost a metric ton of weight I’d be good to go for this summer. Nope. Still a sight sure to terrify small children. Sigh.
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The end of the school year means LOTS of sticky fingerprints all over our display booth. Popsicles, ice cream, sun tan lotion, etc.– all of it wiped on our artwork. 😦 Thank goodness for plastic sleeves– environment be damned!
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If you reuse the plastic it’s not so bad, right? I forgot you work with the tourist class all day long. Does that suck the soul right out of you?
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I start out the summer all chipper, but by the end of the season, my soul has shriveled up into a raisin-sized morsel, which then gets ground into a sticky pulp by some random tourist’s shoe. Who needs a soul, anyway?
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That lady by the sign….do you know what beach she will be at? I like a lot of shade when I’m at the beach.
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Ouch!
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Ah, number 10. It always works out so well for me that by the time I decide to give in and buy a suit, they’re down to mismatching pairs of XXXL two-pieces.
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