I will love you forever! Or for the next two weeks, whichever comes first.
Facebook ROCKS!!! LMAO, ROF, LOL.
Why am I talking like this? Because I have been transformed back to my 12-year-old self today, thanks to Facebook.
A couple of weeks ago, I was friended by a friend of someone who went to my grade school. I don’t think I actually know this guy, but what the heck. He’s from my hometown, and who doesn’t need new friends? Since we’re such good buddies, I get to see what he does online. I know who his friends are. I look at his pictures, and listen in on his conversations with other friends.
In real life, I would need to be an FBI agent to do this kind of stalking without getting slapped with a restraining order. In Facebook World, it’s business as usual.
Today my best buddy, thrice removed, befriended Don Ricker.
Donny Ricker! His locker was next to mine in 7th grade. I had a GINORMOUS crush on him. He was cute, sweet, and kinda shy. I just melted when he flipped his retainer in and out of his mouth. OK, OK, I know. What counts as flirtation is a little different when you’re 12.
Since I was still in the braces stage, I didn’t know anything about retainers. I did deep research at the library and the orthodontist’s office. When we met between classes at “our special place”, I casually tossed out retainer-related tidbits. I exhausted every possible conversational gambit having to do with retainers in a desperate attempt to hold his interest.
After only a few months, the school redid the locker assignments. Next thing I know, he’s flipping his retainer for his new locker-neighbor. Our affair was over.
It has been almost 40 years since he tossed away the combination to my heart. If the world were fair, karma would have paid him back for his (perhaps unwitting) cruelty to the young, lovesick me. I bet he’s bald, paunchy and miserable.
I snuck over to his Facebook page today to see how he turned out. Hubba hubba! Sigh.
Peg-o-Leg's Ramblings 
this is so funny, its such a good place for a healthy, childhood crush stalk!
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That sounds like the voice of experience! (?)
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OMG it would have been so much easier if you could have texted him back in those days, and told him he was gr8 !
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I’m sure he never suspected he was the object of all my pre-adolescent fantasies, and I would NEVER have the nerve to tell him!
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Let me guess – he’s an orthodontist now, right?
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That would be perfect!
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He’s probably an gorgeous orthodontist with a model-thin wife, 2.5 kids, and a ginormous house in the suburbs!!
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Or he’s gay, ya never know.
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I wish only the best for (one of) my first loves!
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It’s never too late for a new retainer, although it’s possible your husband might object.
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Hey now, no innuendo to spoil such an innocent memory!
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Imagine his surprise if he reads this post.
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Yeah, I was just thinking I should have changed his name…
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Peg-O-Leg (or is that Peg-O-McLeg??) – it was two years ago today that we were leaving on a jet plane for the beautiful Emerald Isles!!! Sigh!! How I wish we could go back to that beautiful place shown in your blog’s page header area!! (I realize this has nothing to do with the orthodontics/adolesence situation mentioned above, but I thought I’d explain for your reading audience where that lovely photo came from… :))
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I’m listening to RTE radio, as usual, and they’re talking about all the traffic delays because of the various parades around the old sod. I WANNA GO BACK!!!
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Great story. It made me smile and remember the Donny Ricker in my life.
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Thanks. I hope your Donny was kinder than mine.
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