Misty at Misty’s Laws did a post recently about weird search terms that lead readers to her blog. That inspired me to go down to my stats dungeon to find out how non-subscribed readers stumble into this little piece of heaven.
Fortunately, people aren’t getting here by searching on all kinds of weird, sexual fetish terms as so many other bloggers have reported. (That could read “unfortunately” if that is your criteria for a successful blog.)
Although I haven’t had any “platypus love – is it wrong?” kind of questions, I was interested to see proof of something I’d only casually noted before. A lot of people, using a variety of search terms, get directed to the same one of my posts. This accidentally popular post got the usual views and commentary when it was first posted. Ever since then, however, it has had a steady stream of readers each week.
This little offering is my 7th most popular post of all time, lagging only behind those that were Freshly Pressed.
Since the topic seems to be an ongoing issue for many, I am reposting it here. Let’s think of this along the lines of a public service offering instead of as proof that I have diddly-squat in the way of original ideas right now, shall we?
If You Don’t Post This On Your Facebook Page, It Means You Want Me To Die
I have a friend who uses Facebook almost exclusively for emotional blackmail.
When I say “friend”, I mean in the new Facebook sense. This is someone I barely remember from high school, and whose friend request I stupidly approved when I first signed up and didn’t know any better.
I used to think the most annoying thing about Facebook was the constant status updates from those who wanted gold, billy goats, or some other cyber crap because they were playing Farmville or Pioneer Trail games all day. Now I realize that the emotionally needy “friend” is much worse.
Almost every day, my friend’s status updates appear on my Home Page bearing a new friendship litmus test. She posted all the following in just one month:
· I need prayers so bad right now.!!!! Hope someone cares. If u are my friend click the like button & then re-post. If I don’t see your name, I’ll understand. May I ask my “Facebook Family” wherever u may be to kindly copy, paste and share this status for one hour to give a prayer of support to all those who have family problems, struggles and worries and just need to know that someone cares. Do it for all of us for no-one is immune. I hope to see this on the walls of all my friends just for moral support. I know some will!! I did it for a friend and you can too. Share some faith and love for those in need. Life works in strange ways.
· I cried when you passed away. I still cry today. Although I loved you dearly, I couldn’t make you stay. A golden heart stopped beating, hard working hands at rest. God broke my heart to prove to me he only takes the best.
Keep this rose going for anyone in heaven that you’ve loved and lost – but never forgot
Put this up as your status, most of you won’t – but respect to those that do…..to all our loved ones. Missing you especially during the holidays ahead.
· I don’t need an angel on my Christmas tree , I already have one in Heaven looking down on me! . . . . Put this as your status if there is someone in heaven you wish could be with you this Christmas. ♥
· I am not hot or gorgeous, I don’t have an amazing figure or a flat stomach. I’m far from being considered a model but I’m ME. I eat food, I have curves, I love my Pj’s, and I go without makeup. I’m random and crazy, I don’t pretend to be someone I’m not. I am who I am, you can love me or not (ask me if I care). I won’t change!! And if i love you, I do it with all my heart!! I make no apologies for the way I am. Ladies put this on your status if your proud of who you are…..HELL YEA
. This is the eye test. Look for the LOWER case ‘L’ and you will be kissed tomorrow! LLLLLLLLLl LLLLLLL. Now look for the ‘N’. This is really hard. MMMMMMMMMMMMNMMMMMMM. Now find the mistake ABCDEFGHIJ KLNMOPQRSTUVWXYZ. Now wish for something you really want after the countdown! 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1, now close your eyes and make a wish *********. Now put this as your status and your wish will come true! you have 19 minutes. Or what you wished for will be the opposite
· I personally believe in Jesus Christ. A man on face book has challenged all believers to put this on their wall. The Bible says, “If you deny Me in front of your peers, I will deny you in front of my Father”. This is a simple test. If you love God and you are not afraid to show it, re-post this. I proudly did. Will you?
· Dear Santa, I don’t want much for Christmas, I just want the person reading this to be happy. Friends are the fruit cake of life — some nutty, some soaked in alcohol, some sweet, but mix them together and they’re my friends. At Christmas you always hear people talking about what they want & bought. This is what I want: I want people who are sick with no cure to be able to be cured. I want children with no families to be adopted. I want people to never have to worry about food, shelter & heat. I want peace and love for everyone! Now, let’s see how many people re-post this….I have a feeling I am gonna see almost no re-posts. PLEASE prove me wrong
· Friendships are special… So lets start a friendship ring… If you are my friend, click the like button and then re-post… If I don’t see your name, I’ll understand
· Many people have passed away early! – When we look at the sky, we LOVE the idea that they look back at us. We remember them often, at night, when we look at the stars … a date … a song … somewhere … a smell … A memory of those who left us ..ALWAYS LOVED, deeply missed ..Post this as your status if you have someone keeping an eye on you from above….I know I do!♥
“Hope someone cares”, “if you are my friend”, “let’s see who reposts this”, “most of you won’t post this” – do we notice a common theme here? It’s emotional blackmail. The message is clear: if you don’t do as I say, you don’t care about me.
I have nothing against status updates that ask for prayers, or pass on inspiring messages. These can make me stop and think, and are often rather sweet. But how about if we agree to leave off the “pass it on or else” riders?
If everyone reading my blog would repost this to his or her blog and WordPress page, we could put an end to emotional blackmail on Facebook once and for all. If you don’t repost, I’ll know you want me to come down with a bad case of toenail fungus.