To Grandmother’s House We Go

wiseguyscard

My real-life Christmas Card.

Sorry about the tiny type – I REALLY have to figure out how to use Gimp or Photoshop or something better than the Paint program that came with this old computer.  It’s on my to-do list. If you click on the picture it makes it just a little larger and easier to read.

This is also my entry in the “What the holidays really mean” Christmas card contest being run on both Go Jules Go and The Byronic Man’s blogs.  Julie.Davidoski@yahoo.com and byronicmanblog@gmail.com.   I could really use the sheets they’re giving away because it has been a tough year for us.  We had to sell our sheets to earn money for our child’s liver transplant….which she needed after we sold her liver to earn money for Muscato…which we needed to drown our sorrows because it has been a tough year.

Not that I want the judges to let my abysmal life situation influence their decision – not at all.  Nope.

About pegoleg

R-A-M-B-L-I-N-G-S, Ram...Blin!
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41 Responses to To Grandmother’s House We Go

  1. mistyslaws says:

    Hey! No fair trying to play the sympathy vote AND on Jules’ love for any references to booze. Play fair, Peggles. Don’t make me get all ninja on ya.

    And damnit . . . that “check out what’s in MY manger” gag gets me every time! Every. Damn. Time.

    Like

  2. Tori Nelson says:

    I think you had my vote at first sight of those glorious McD’s arches… the sad sacrificing of sheets to buy a kid and organ didn’t hurt either!

    Like

  3. Go Jules Go says:

    Oh Pegglez. Yes, you get a “z” today. (You probably hate that, don’t you?)

    This card is almost TOO real. And your poor, liverless child. You’re in it to win it, I see.

    Well done!

    Like

    • pegoleg says:

      Jules, do I have to send a copy of this to you to be officially entered? I’d hate for some techno-type (like Misty) to demand I be disqualified for not following the rules.

      Like

      • Go Jules Go says:

        No way, Peggles! Putting up a post is one of the methods we suggested (thanks to B Man’s ability to think ahead)! I’m sure it won’t surprise you to hear I’m keeping a list of the entrants, and you’re tooootally added to it. I mean this literally.

        Like

  4. Thank you for reinforcing our guilt-ridden decision NOT to travel to grandma’s this year!

    Like

  5. Tar-Buns says:

    One hump or two? Pretty card, Pegoleg. I missed the organ transplant news.
    BTW, I see you have your Etsy shop listed on the side. Only thing, there’s no picture or link to click on – just in case you thought it was up. Maybe you’re still working on it.
    On the plus side, I also see you are approximately 125 hits from your goal of 100,000. I think you can hit that before the new year. Way to go! :)

    Like

    • pegoleg says:

      I can’t figure out how to get the picture to post. I’ve wasted way too many valuable minutes today, minutes I DON”T HAVE, trying to figure it out. I gave up.

      I didn’t want to worry the family about the liver thing. You know how I am.

      Like

  6. Is there anything worse than entering a contest and then having people submit entries that make your look pathetic? OK, maybe going without a liver is worse, but having a weak contest entry over-shadowed by everyone else has got to take second.

    Like

    • pegoleg says:

      Dave, I go through this self-wrestling with every contest. Do I throw in some lame entry just so my bloggy buddy doesn’t think I’m ignoring them, or bow-out because all I can come up with is something so, you know, lame?

      I do think having a pathetic entry may be slightly worse than a bum liver, but that’s just me and my wretched ego.

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  7. k8edid says:

    Well, shit. I mean, shazzam. I am frank-incensed at the brilliance of this card. I am just going to forget my own pathetic pretense at a funny entry now…and spend the rest of my holiday time drinking. Thanks, Peg. Soon I’ll be looking for a liver, myself.

    Like

  8. Well crap. Everyone knows I don’t know how to play with PhotoShop, and I’m not funny or ironic. And I’m not Byronic. But I want those sheets. Just because I won a few contests, I’m like…blacklisted from contests. Not fair.

    Also, this is way cool.

    Like

  9. Oh 4 gold stars and you got my vote! (and don’t you even think about selling that gold…..)

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  10. I really like your use of symbolism in the card, also, your use of irony, juxtaposed with an unanswerable reflection of pre vs post-modernism. The modesty of the work does not make it any the less seminal and I was blown away by how your evocative layers take us through a journey of self-discovery leaving us breathless and questioning our very existence.

    That was what you were going for right?

    Like

  11. I just spewed my fermented goat milk all over my keyboard. Thanks for that, Pego. Your paint skillz are top-notch and I hope you have sweet dreams sleeping and drooling all over B-man’s face. I’m not jealz or anything. I do wonder why I’m putting Zs at the ends of all my wordz, though. I can’t even pretend to be hip at my age. Sigh.

    Like

    • pegoleg says:

      I think you are way hip for realz, in a far-out and happening way, cool cat! At least you’re not lamely trying to pretend you speak French, like SOME people do to try to impress. Le sigh.

      Like

  12. Al says:

    Well, Peg, you’ve finally done it. You’ve stooped as low as you can go. Selling organs for booze. Why not just advertise them on your etsy site? At least I know I’ll never lose my dignity to that point.

    P.S. Just out of curiosity though, how much could one get for a kidney? You see, I have this friend…..

    Like

  13. Don’t make me turn this caravan around! :)

    Like

  14. joehoover says:

    I’m a loyal Paint advocate too, but some things I had such trouble with that I tried the free Gimp software and searched a few tutorials online, used it a couple of times and it was a lot better not getting tendinitus as a result!

    Like

    • pegoleg says:

      I downloaded Gimp and figured out how to resize photos, a definite plus. But I spent hours trying to figure out how to layer words over the top and just couldn’t get it. Their online manual is pretty bad (ie technical).Maybe I should try to find the online tutorials – thanks!

      Like

  15. I’m responding to e-mails for my company this month, and – no kidding – we got one from someone asking for free Christmas stuff because she has MS. I’ve shared your story with her – she has two healthy kids, maybe one of them can help you out with that liver thingy.

    Like

  16. I always enjoy a good, old-fashioned Paint-edited photo. Seriously. It reminds me of the good old days.

    Like

  17. Pingback: Holy Sheet: A Holiday Giveaway – The Entrants! | Go Jules Go

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